Here we are, closing in on another new year. The holidays can be very stressful with all the busy-ness, family gatherings, places to go, and people to see. During this holiday season, I want to share something for anyone who is stuck and struggling with a problem that just won't go away. Maybe it's a problem with drugs or alcohol, sex, gambling, or some other form of addiction. Or maybe it is Codependency, Adult-Child Syndrome, PTSD, depression or anxiety. Maybe it's divorce or financial issues. To you, I offer the following as a message of hope.
In 1968 Joseph Campbell wanted to know what it took to be a "hero" so he studied all the stories he could find about real life and mythical heroes. He found that there was indeed a theme, so he wrote an essay about it. He named it A Hero's Journey. It has since become the backbone of many books and movies. The Hero's Journey has 7 milestones;
1. Hear a Calling
2. Accept the Call
3. Cross the Threshold
4. Face your Demons
5. Transform your Demons
6. Fulfill the Calling
7. Return Home to show others the way.
Perhaps an example will help clarify the journey...
Like many other stories, Bilbo Baggins' journey in The Hobbit was a Hero's Journey. He heard the call but initially did not want to go, after some struggling for a bit, he accepted the call. For the first time ever, Bilbo crossed the threshold into a new land outside of the Shire. He faced many demons along the way, but with the helps of some friends he met along the way, he was able to transform those demons by always finding ways to overcome what seemed impossible. And then the courage to continue on the journey. Again and again, with the help of his friends, Bilbo fulfilled his calling by ultimately defeating the enemy. He then made his journey home to the back to the Shire to share his adventure with others.
A Hero’s Journey of Healing and Recovery
I like this model of "A Hero's Journey" as a way to describe the journey of healing and recovery; whether it be from addiction, codependency, complex-ptsd, adult-child syndrome, or any other chronic condition. Healing and recovery is a truly an heroic Journey!
Here is my take on A Hero's Journey as it relates to 12 step recovery and other healing processes.
1. Hearing the Call: Through an event, or series of events, often referred to as "the wake up call" or "hitting bottom", our hero first hears their calling to change. It may take several wake up calls to convince the hero or heroine to accept the calling.
2. Accepting the Call: Ignoring the call usually causes the symptoms and problems to intensify. Eventually, a hero will accept the call to change and reach out for help.
3. Crossing the Threshold: This comes with the decision to step out of one's "comfort zone" (familiar old life) and into "recovery" (awkward new life) with the help of a sponsor and other friends such as a community support group or church group. A good analogy for what this is like is to imagine suddenly finding yourself in a foreign land. You know nothing about the language, social norms, or culture. You need a guide, mentors, or teachers to teach you the language and show you the way.
4. Facing Your Demons: With the help of your new mentor, sponsor, and friends who have been-there-and-done-that, you face your fears, go to recovery meetings, and learn the language of recovery. .
5. Transforming Your Demons: The spiritual development in recovery leads to powerful new coping skills, self-awareness, and principles for living that help you overcome what seemed impossible to overcome before. You stop the cycles of abandonment, shame, and contempt, and overcome any other unhealthy behavioral and emotional patterns that keep you stuck. Your new recovery skills replace old survival skills that are no longer useful or necessary.
6. Fulfilling The Call: As a result of this journey, you find that you have developed a successful way of life that fulfills the calling and replaces the old painful way of life. A new comfort zone is achieved.
7. Homecoming: This is about carrying the message of Hope back home and passing on what you have learned to others that are stuck in a similar way. As they say in 12-step circles: You must give it away in order to keep it.
To help clarify any questions you may have I created several questionnaires. Complete any or all of these questionnaires below to identify your risk factors:
Are You At Risk for Addiction to Alcohol or Other Drugs
Are You At Risk for Addiction to Gambling
Are You At Risk for Addiction to Sex
Are You At Risk for Addiction to Food
Are You At Risk of Adult-Child Syndrome or C-PTSD
Are You At Risk for Codependency
If you find yourself struggling and stuck in a cycle of pain whether it be from addiction, depression, anxiety, PTSD, Relationship problems, or any other chronic condition, I hope you hear and accept this message as your call to the Hero's Journey! Make this the best New Year of your life!
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