by james

While i agree with the theory of what you say.I would like to tell you that a NHS therapist i saw told me,he said my development was stymied and that to analyse the childhood wound would only make it worse and i could go mad! he has basically concentrated on the present to get me to do things and improve my self esteem..I have told him that is difficult as i always have a nagging doubt about who iam.I have felt the wound which was a desperate need to be loved for who i am (did not happen)in fact i was run down everyday I remember a choice one ,"get out of my sight you little bastard"i am just trying to be kind to myself and forgive myself for all the times i have rejected good things for myself.I have had a lifetime of it.

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Aug 16, 2011
To James
by: Anonymous

James, it sounds like your therapist may be using Reality Therapy, which is a here-and-now, problem solving based therapy. I have worked with counselors who preferred that method of therapy.
I can only share with you that for many years I was the type of person that didn't put much 'stock' into going back in the past and digging up all those issues. I mean really, what's the point?
Well...the point is I had the same nagging feelings and thoughts going on as you mentioned. Plus I had a very difficult time with relationships. All relationships. I always seemed to be in conflict with someone or something. Also, I just didn't feel very happy.
Well I decided to 'go back into the past' and do some work. And then do a little more work. Then do A LOT of work! All I can share with you is that I still do some uncovering and discovering and I will never regret doing that work. I can not move forward with who I am if I don't know where I came from and how those situations impacted me.
I suggest watching the 'Iceberg Lecture' on this site (just click on The Iceberg Model on the right hand side of this page) and there is a power point there that does a lot of explaining!
Good Luck and happy discovering!
Angie C.

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