I'm an Enabler and I'm going to do something about it!

My 23 y/o son moved back in with my husband and I last year after he lost his job at a grocery store for buying beer for an under-age co-worker. Unfortunately, we didn't write up a contract of expectations and boundaries.

Soon after my son moved back in, we found out my husband was terminal with brain cancer. He passed away five months ago. He is gone now and I'm trying to keep it all together. My son stays up most of the night playing computer games (and drinking) and sleeps in until two or three in the afternoon. He does not contribute to the household financially or otherwise. I constantly pick up after him and really am starting to resent him. He has not been looking for work and thinks he's too good for fast food jobs.

I ordered some books on enabling. I am encouraged to know there is something I can do about my own behavior that will hopefully help my son.

Comments for I'm an Enabler and I'm going to do something about it!

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Jun 25, 2010
Thank you.
by: Kardisean

Let me know how this works. We have the same problem with our son. I am also beginning to
resent him. I am also worried that he may not be
able to stand at his own feet someday if this
enabling continues.

I have not have my own life since I've raise him
as a single mom since he was 8 y/o. He has had
problems with his Dad and all his various girlfriends he exposed him. He feel a lot of anger to his dad, and now, he is suffering from
GAD and social phobia. I really do not know how to deal with his issue.

Thank you for sharing your own experience, maybe
you can shed some light to my own tunner.

May 13, 2010
Good Decision!
by: Don Carter

It is a wise choice making that decision to get out of this trap while you can. Keep studying...when we get sick, or find that we have heart trouble or some other illness the first thing we do is study up on that illness... we must become experts about the challenges that we face in order to deal with them effectively.

I hope we can be of help when you have questions along the way!

God Bless and Good luck!


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