I have had it with enablers!
Hi I am a mom of a 24 year old who's been drinking since she was 16. She has 2 DUI's now both high BAC (.186 and .192)
When she got the first one, I cut her off financially when she was in college and told her it was time to go to treatment and stop the drinking. She went to my wealthy family and they went behind my back and paid her bills. I didnt find this out until about a year after the DUI. My daughter slowly stopped speaking to me. She then started talking to me again after she appealed her conviction, lost, and was on probation for a year. A year later she got another DUI.
She hid the second DUI from me, goes to my parents and two sisters. They have continued to pay her tuition , buy her a car etc. My daughter just graduated from nursing school. I wasn't invited but my whole enabling family went. Thats when Grandma rewarded her with a car.
M daughter was on probation for 12 months for the second DUI. Because I discovered her dad who is a judge was interfering in the legal system I got very involved. I knew she was drinking on probation and reported her. She was posting to her facebook pages her drunken partying. Thru a year of probation she violated probation and had 3 failed interlock reports and 6 failed random alcohol tests. The legal system wasnt going to do anything, her dad kept showing up at the hearings.
Now my family keeps giving her money. She is supposed to take her boards but I think they are investigating the info I sent the nursing board about her. She spent the last 3 weeks in Vegas and Miami partying. Yet, my parents say things like she's 24 years old...you cannot control her!
I know I cannot force her to treatment but I also know if they do not stop enabling she will never consider treatment. I am hoping that the nursing board will give her a chance at nursing but put her in treatment. (Thatst what they told me they could do, if she proves to be a good risk they can force her into treatment. Makes u feel real great if you r a patient huh? And, How come its OK they force her but I can't. I digress. )
Thats all I ask...she actually be told she needs treatment,. After that I cannot do anything more.
How do I get them to stop?