Husband and Step Dad issues

by Teresa

Hello, I'm really having a problem. My son owes us money. It was for a car he owes about 2500. My son andnmaking has been through allot and so have I. His dad passed and I got remarried too soon. I believe it was for him and sold the family home. everything happened quick. I feel like he feels he lost everything. I think he acted out at his step dad because of this. My step husband isn't allowing him over to see me because of this debt. Which is keeping my son from me at my home. My son offered to work it off at that time because he had no money. My husband said that wasn't the deal. I can't live in a home where he isn't Welcomed. I do believe that we should be paid back, if that's what my husband wants. I just wish they both could realize they where both hurting and forgive and let go, or at least allow my son to come see me. Work out the debt in a different way. My husband is so set on him not coming here. I'm going to leave. I can't be someone where he isn't allowed. I feel he needs me to talk with right now. I don't want to enable him. I just what to show love and I feel like let him down at that time because I was grieving too. Please comment back soon thank you!

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Dec 20, 2016

by: Don

Hi Teresa,

Sorry for all you are going through and this is not much information.

I think you want to know if you are enabling your son. It depends on things like is he doing everything he can do for himself? Or does he expect you to do things for him that he should be able to do himself?

It may also be important to understand why he owes the money... Drinking?, Drugs? Legal trouble? or just unfortunate circumstances not of his own making?

Please share more of this kind of information. I think others are more likely to share their experience and opinions when they have a good sense of the issues.

Thanks, Glad you are here!

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