Expressing the results of enabling behavior

by sandy

Painting is from the,"Don't Bame the Messenger Collection"

The results I see from enabling behaviors are whether one is addicted or not we can enable people and do for them so much that we take away their belief in themselves w/o realizing it we think that when they cry", I can't do it or I don't know what to do", and we jump in and do it for them , we are actually robbing them of their own ability to dig deeply into themselves and figure out that they can do it. When we repeat this behavior over and over we create a dependent being whom we resent and they also eventually resent us.

Why do I or we do this? Because I or we have a void in ourselves . Or because we truly believe these people are pathetic-which is the message we send either way.

I know I have truly been given a happy heart and I am always facing challenges but I suppose I am surprised when these perseptions start becoming all tangled and then I want to fly away.

I notice when I enable someone, I will kick into these behaviors when I am feeling insecure myself about something or someone and my insecurity or loneliness starts driving my life and taking over my life. Loneliness can be deep seeded and unidentifiable at times and can effect many of my motives for my decisions which project the insecurities even further into a down turn.

When I journal and can realize this is going on, I can embrace it and see it for what it is and create more secure and loving motives for myself and others. Then I see the illusion in it. I can swim around in the mud for a while though

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Mar 10, 2012
by: Don

Hi Sandy,

thanks for the AWESOME post!


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