The Swan Lake Ballet, "When will I ever Dance?"

by Artist: Kathleen D. Cone
(Phoenix AZ)

The Swan Lake Ballet,

The Swan Lake Ballet, "When will I ever Dance?"

No Guilt, No Blame, No Remorse!

When I was a child, I was a gifted child. I won awards and accolades from my peers, my teachers and the society around me. My parents were very proud.

It just so happens, that at about the age of 8 and as a result of hard work and concentrated efforts, I won a special award in music and was taken to see the performance of, "The Swan Lake Ballet' in Stuttgart, Germany. It was magical.

Inspired to dance, my parents began paying for dance lessons. My mother made me a mint green ballerina's dress. It was simple yet very beautiful.

But, she warned, as always... "not to go off by myself and dance in the fields near our home".
I disobeyed, and wore my beautiful, beautiful green dress.

The buttercups were blooming, the ladies slippers in full color.. the bluebell's were singing and I was dancing and dancing and dancing.

As it began to turn dark, I rushed home so I wouldn't get in trouble for being late, and when I arrived and my mother saw me in my 'forbidden' dress, she became so angry, she tore the dress off my body and into pieces, and I never got to dance again.

"Mental illness is a very cruel task master. It gathers foxtails in the hem of your ballet dress".

With much love and compassion for my Mother ~
Artist, Kathleen D. Cone

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Feb 07, 2010
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Creativity is so healing...
by: Don

I'm very happy to be seeing such beautiful "heART work" here.

They say the subconscious mind is the realm of emotion, the inner children, creativity, AND self-healing...

The subconscious mind uses sensory modalities (visual, auditory, and kinesthetic) to communicate with parts of self that don't understand digital modalities (words).

Ever notice how you can just feel better and not know how to put it into words after looking at a painting, hearing a soothing melody, or wrapping up in a warm blanket? It's good to do these things frequently. (Aroma therapy is another good example).

One can see healing all over these posts!! Thanks for sharing them here.

Don

Feb 06, 2010
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The Dance of Dances
by: Kathleen D. Cone

Billy,

What an amazing poem! I'm taken aback by it! The Dance of Shame....It's odd how I read on this site, about shame, and yes I added it to the list of things I experienced as a child, but your poem just really brought it home.... I didn't tell myself about this experience until I could put it into art, because of the shame it caused me.... wow... shame, how interesting and insightful of you...

If you look closely at the art piece to the right past the center you will see a nude looking (it's obscured) woman-child (really a young woman) out on a sort of plank or narrow board walk sitting by herself silently... broken by the shame of being stripped nude and violently.

Your Poem was so descriptive of the feeling it even explained to me more what I was trying to say intuitively with this work....the Swan Lake Ballet, "When will I ever Dance". I've been dancing the dance of shame ever since ... wow, wow, wow!

Kathy

Feb 05, 2010
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Billy that was a beautiful poem
by: Kathleen D. Cone

Billy,

You hit it right on the nail head, with your creative writing.

I'd like to tell you a story about this piece of art and how it brought me to this site on the net.

"ART CAN BE DANGEROUS"

I want to tell you all something I learned as I was working on my last art piece.. The Swan Lake Ballet, "When will I ever Dance?" And, what will be the focus of my next collage.

As some of you know, the collage " The Swan Lake Ballet, is about a trauma from my early childhood." One I thought I'd overcome.. and indeed in most ways I have... but as I was working on this piece of art, I made a deliberate effort to get in touch with the way in which I actually felt when the trauma was occuring and along with this, other violent cruelities that I experienced in my childhood..

This was my way of truly expressing what I felt was important in completing the 'Swan Lake" art piece and a getting in touch with the missing piece of the puzzle to who I have become, as a result of the emotional blindness the horrors of my childhood have been able to create.

Although, I cannot say for certain this regression into the past is the sole reason for what I am about to tell you, I can say it has most certainly played a dominate role

A short time ago.. I found myself going through a horifying experience dealing with a ~ 'Panic Attack' which landed me at St. Joseph's hospital, thinking I was having a heart problem and very frightened by the myriad of physical symptoms. ...

These attacks lasted 8 days until I took medication to stop the brain triggers that were seting off the physical symptoms I was experiencing. Since then it's been one roller coaster ride experience, after another.

I do think getting in touch with your feelings is a positive thing... and even this experience is a positive thing, in that it is a wake up call telling me I need to take better care of myself and find a better balance in my life and inner person...

To my surprise, I had no idea I was repressing such overwhelming feelings of grief, fear and obvious subconcious panic...

So, ART CAN BE DANGEROUS,And even more so if To thine ownself you are true", I am learning that if you are honest with yourself and your work as an artist....it is also a labor of love.. in this case.. self love... and although I'd rather the problem be gone and not have to continue to deal with this ongoing wave of emotional sea sickness.

I'm grateful to have all of you supporting my work and loving me in the meantime... Thank you so very very much....

with the deepest of appreciation..*Kathy

Feb 05, 2010
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Dance of Shame
by: Billy

The dance of dances, when did it all begin, and when will it ever end, was it ever my friend?

We learned its steps when to glide and when to hide to keep us safe deep inside.

We lived in hell, playing the shame blame game we knew all to well who could we ever trust to tell.

The feelings come and then they go following the control of my life's external ebb and flows.

A dance I once did not know and today it is all I know following my internal ebb and flow; what is it that I still pretend not to know.

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