Solving the problem.....

by Chris
(Knoxville TN)

I have identified myself as an internalizer, by definition according to your description. Literally all of those characteristics without exception. I have displayed all of them. I can even look back on a time when I had alot of money and blew it all simply because I didnt feel like I deserved success. Who in the HELL does that to themself?

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Nov 08, 2011
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Its not about the money
by: Don

I have a friend who says money problems are never about money...it is about relationships. What better means of acting out abandonment, shame, and contempt than to have money problems.

Emotional themes like "there is never enough x" for example... In childhood "x" may mean love. In adulthood, "x" may mean money and get translated into "there is never enough money".

Or the theme might be "There is barely enough x to get by". (x = love, money, food, work, etc.)

Abandonment issues can be acted out through one crisis after another where no one there to help you. Shame issues can come from not being able to pay your bills, your electric or phone turned off, bankruptcy, etc. Contempt can be acted out with bill collectors on the phone who provide a place for your anger to come out!

Bankers, credit card companies, and lotteries can be the focus of rescue fantasies... and as soon as they come through, you somehow find a way to get into the same bind again shortly thereafter!

Money issues are rarely about money! this is another good reason to invest in your recovery from abandonment issues!

Take care,
Don

Nov 02, 2011
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im not meant to have money
by: Lisa

I have done it. I was just thinking the other day, why can't I get on the same track as everyone else...

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