Comments for OH God can I die now?

Comments for
OH God can I die now?

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Dec 17, 2010
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Not Now, You Have A Purpose ........
by: Anonymous

Wow. I'm curious as to how you are doing and feeling and what's going on five months later ....

I sure hope things are better with you, and that your wife is getting help for her problems, as well as yourself getting help.

I too was at the end of my rope 16 years prior to the inevitable divorce. I stayed with an alcoholic ice man for 28 years. I feel now as though I wasted those years of my life, but I know now that my purpose was to raise my children. Things happen for a reason, even very bad things. The point of the game I think is to learn from bad things and use them for something positive in our lives.

Loving your wife and not wanting her to be alone was a very selfless thing, sacrificing your own happiness to be there for someone else. It's not until we are in the habit of foresaking our own feelings of happiness and peace that we finally see that our own happiness and contentment is equally important. We all have our reasons, but the important thing is that you have realized that you were enabling her and you could see that she was being detrimental to herself and her family. Her financial problems forced you into a rut that was way out of your league. A man wants to prosper and protect his family, and you did, but when you're weighted down like that it's impossible. Low self esteem develops and then it's just a cycle.

I do hope you will post again and let us know how you are. My prayers are with you and everyone on this forum that needs help. God Bless you! Merry Christmas ......

A Fellow Enabler (bux EX-wife) Yay !!!

Jul 02, 2010
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When to leave?
by: Evan

Sometimes loving requires skill. Sometimes we don't have that skill. Sometimes we are loving and the other person is still too traumatised to believe it. All this is I think is difficult but true.

In a situation where our partner behaves in ways that cause problems I think all we can do is work on agreements. These need to include bottom lines: when we will leave for the good of ourselves or the kids (if children are involved). This is awful and difficult, but I don't see any alternative.

It is worth seeing if outsiders can help. Sometimes they can, sometimes they can't.

Sometimes there is nothing that we can do. Awful but true.

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