I have a problem I can't control any longer

I just don't know how to feel anymore, I feel out of control and having symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder. My husband has left me and we share a child together and it is all because I can't see the truth and constantly find myself questioning why he's in my life. Thinking I'm not good enough and then lashing out. I don't want to lose him but I keep sabotaging my life and my family.

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