HOW DO I STOP

MY SON IS 35 YRS OLD AND IS CURRENTLY ADDICTED TO HEROIN. HE HAS GONE FROM ALCOHOL, COCAINE AND NOW HIS DRUG OF CHOICE IS HEROIN. I ALWAYS BELIEVE THE STORIES HE TELLS ME HOPING THIS TIME THEY ARE TRUE I FEEL IF I DONT GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTS AS FAR AS MONEY GOES HE WILL GET IT SOME OTHER ILLEGAL WAY DEEP DOWN INSIDE I KNOW I AM WRONG AND I KNOW I DO THESE THINGS TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER I KNOW I AM LOVING MY SON TO DEATH BUT HE SEEMS TO KNOW HOW TO "WORK ME" HOW DO I STOP, HE CURRENTLY LOST HIS JOB, APARTMENT AND SOLD EVERY SINGLE THING HE AS WORKED FOR. HE WAS DOING GOOD FOR THE PAST THREE YEARS AND JUST "DABBLED" WITH ALCOHOL AND COCAINE BUT SEEM TO KEEP IT TOGETHER, HEROIN HAS GOT A HOLD OF HIM AND WONT LET GO. I HAVE SPOKEN TO PEOPLE IN ADDICTIONS AND HAVE EVEN CONVINCED HIM TO GO TO DETOX WHICH HE DID BUT HE WASNT WITHDRAWING ENOUGH TO BE ADMITTED, THAT IS THE PROBLEM HE TELLS ME HE CANT IT HURTS TO BAD TO WITHDRAWN FROM THIS DEVIL OF A DRUG.....AND WHO WANTS TO SEE THEIR KID NO MATTER HOW OLD HURTING HE HAS ME PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY ILL, DO I JUST LET HIM GO I DONT KNOW ANYMORE AND HOW DO YOU STOP THE WORRYING

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Jul 09, 2014
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Right on the Money
by: Anonymous

I certainly related to this article. Many sincere thanks......

Feb 04, 2012
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enabler
by: Anonymous

I realize I'am an enabler and would walk away ,but what about the grandchildren, who I care deeply for.?They are safe.Have a roof over there head,food but addicted mom and an alcoholic father that does not live with them.

Sep 06, 2011
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Hmmm...
by: Don Carter

Wow...those are two very good questions:

1) "How do I stop enabling him?"

Your inability to stop enabling is testimony to the fact that you have an addiction that is just as powerful as his. Enabling is an addiction that progressively gets worse the longer you practice it. You are experiencing the very problem you are trying to solve... POWERLESSNESS & UNMANAGEABILITY.

I suspect those addiction professionals already told you that AND that you need help too. Not convinced yet? Suppose for a moment that it's true, then ask yourself this question: "How can I expect him to do that which I am not willing or able to do for myself?"

2) How do I stop worrying?

In this case, I would worry about you if you stopped worrying about this...in this case, worry is your friend, encouraging you to do the next right thing...which...in this case, according to most every addiction professional I know, is to get help for yourself first.

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