Enabling a person with Panic Anxiety/Depression, Highly Sensitive disorders

by Doris
(Cleveland)

I am the mother of a 50 year old daughter who has issues with depression, panic-anxiety disorder and is a highly sensitive person. We began living together 7 years ago, after her sister and nephew could no longer take her "moods." At the time I was living in another city, they were having so much trouble that I moved back to the city where they were and bought a house for me and the daughter who has these issues (for the sake of this story I will call her Christina).

I have suffered at her hands for these 7 years, and I know that I have picked up the pieces when needed, instead of allowing her to do it. She cannot keep a job -- there is always something wrong with it or with someone on the job, changes jobs often, some of the time -- no job.

When things are going well with her, she's loving and a nice person. But at the times that she's in a bad mood, all hell breaks loose and I too am the brunt of her anger. She will throw things, slam doors, etc. and talk really bad to me. I am sick and tired, but cannot seem to get the strength to move out and leave her to herself. I know that she is ill, and as her mother find it difficult to leave her to herself.

She sees a therapist sometime, but not often enough due to lack of health insurance. I too, see a therapist some time. There are times I see one on a regular basis. I have applied for a seniors apt and it will be available within the next 6 months. I want to move, but have trouble fluctuating between "she needs me" and "I need to let her be." If anyone else can relate to this or has some advice, please respond.