confusion

by maria lawson
(london uk)

If we have ego states telling you what to do and think and argue with each other what is the point of living if you are not in charge of your own mind.
there is only 1 self in me I think nothing like my parents I make my own decisions,any one with an identity problem would go mad believing this stupid idea of TA that you have internalized other people, and have a child in your head.

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May 21, 2014
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Good therapy and bad therapy...
by: Don Carter

Hello, thanks for your comments and bringing up an opportunity to talk about good therapy vs bad therapy.

Bad therapy is where you have someone telling you how things "are" and trying to make a square peg fit in a round hole. someone who doesn't take the time to get to know YOU and your "map of the world" or world view.

Good therapy is where you have a therapist as a partner in your journey who can offer a multitude of models for therapy and help you choose one that works for you.

The good therapist won't be so wedded to a model for understanding the inner world of a person that they try to force it on them - it's only a model. and everyone has their own map of the world - that is what should determine the form of therapy that should be selected.

In the case of ego-states, there is nothing mysterious about it - other terms for ego-states are aspects of self, mood states (we all have our moods), parts of self, Jungian archetypes, and a plethora of other names.

We have all caught ourselves saying - "part of me wants to do this but another part says no way!"

An example of shifting from one inner state to another is when a couple are in the middle of a fight and the doorbell rings - immediately they both shift our of "fight mode" and into "receiving visitors mode". Most of us shift moods, or inner states many times a day, depending on the context.

When we have childhood trauma, these shifts can be much more dramatic - and they are often referred to as "triggers" for that reason. They trigger a dramatic shift in mood or inner experience.

In short, these are tools for people who can use them and not meant for those who cannot. If you find a resource, person, or model that doesn't fit your map of the world and what you need, I recommend not spending much there and moving on in search of someone or something that DOES work for you.

Thanks again,
Don


May 03, 2014
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EGO STATES
by: maureen lawson

THANK GOODNESS SOMEONE ELSE THINKS AS I DO, TELLING SOMEONE YOU ARE DICTATED TO BY DIFFERENT EGO STATES IS INSANE, I TO AM NOTHING LIKE MY PARENTS OR TEACHERS, I MAKE MY OWN DECISIONS, NO WONDER SOME PEOPLE HAVE PROBLEMS AFTER ATTENDING TA THERAPY AND GESTALT THERAPY.

May 03, 2014
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ego states
by: maureen

Thank you for your comment, I have been traumatized after going to TA therapy, because I got the idea that I am not in charge of my own thinking, with all these ego states, I am now battling to convince myself I am one self, thank you again for your insight.

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