Comments for Am I enabling my room mate?

Comments for
Am I enabling my room mate?

Average Rating

Click here to add your own comments

Jan 25, 2010
Rating

WIN-WIN!
by: Anonymous

I may be reading this too late, but if it's that important to both of them, let him go to HER place instead of yours.... WIN-WIN!

Jan 07, 2010
Rating

To Lila
by: Angie Carter

There are usually three questions I run any situation through before I make a decision. The first one is- Is it any of my business? The second one is- How important is it? The third one is- Can I do anything about it?

If I were in this situation and I ran it through the first question the answer for me would be no. It would not be any of my business if his girlfriend wants to "baby him" after foot surgery. That is their relationship and it wouldn't have anything to do with me. Just because he is a roommate of mine does not mean I have jurisdiction over his relationship.

Now, on the other hand if someone living in my home has behaviors that bring me harm or directly impact me in a negative way, then it's my business. But I don't have the right to control other people's behaviors and how their relationships are. Besides caring for and tending to someone after a surgery isn't exactly enabling. Sure, sometimes people can do things for themselves after surgeries or major illnesses, but it's okay to have other care for you for a time being in this since. In my opinion it's called nurturing.

I would encourage you to examine your inner self and see if there are any control patterns that you see happening in your life in regards to others. If there isn't any, no worries! If there seems to be, it could be beneficial to explore that.

Good luck!

Jan 06, 2010
Rating

You Know
by: Anonymous

It sounds like you know it wouldn't be.

But you may choose to make the decision based on other values.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How?
Simply click here to return to Enabling Behavior Discussion Forum

Return to Am I enabling my room mate?

This information is not a substitute for professional evaluation and/or treatment. Reading the information contained here may trigger strong emotional reactions. If you have an emergency, call 911, other local emergency contact, your local emergency room, or law enforcement agency.